Gigi Hadid had anxiety about whether she would be a "good enough" mother while pregnant.
The model and her boyfriend Zayn Malik welcomed their first child, a daughter named Khai, last September.
Discussing her pregnancy in an interview for the August 2021 issue of Harper's Bazaar, Gigi recalled how she used to regularly write in her journal as means of exploring her emotions relating to first-time parenthood.
"During my pregnancy, I had one journal that I called my good journal and one journal that I called my bad journal. They weren't that literal, but one was more for the memories, for Khai. Maybe one day I'll give her the bad journal just to be real about it," she shared, revealing that the "bad" journal was dedicated to jotting down notes about her fears. "Anxieties and days where I felt like, 'Am I good enough to be a mom?' I didn't want to feel guilty about feeling those things or writing those things down. I just liked the separation."
Elsewhere in the chat, Gigi opened up about how she adopts a character when in front of the camera for modelling gigs.
The star explained that she likes to think of herself as a "sculpture" when onset, and photographer Steven Meisel even lets her shoot with a mirror behind propped up behind him.
"The point is not to be distracted by yourself or even look at yourself in the mirror. It's about being able to look at the camera, and then, kind of in your out-of-focus vision, is the shape of you," the 26-year-old said. "It's training a model to understand how she fits into the photo, which is why I became a model. Obviously, I'm not saying this as anything disrespectful against women, but you have to look at yourself like an object or a fashion object or a sculpture."