Shia LaBeouf has confessed that he contemplated suicide before converting to Catholicism.
In a video interview with Word on Fire Catholic Ministries' Bishop Robert Barron on Thursday night, the Transformers actor revealed that he considered suicide when his career hit a low point after a string of legal troubles, including his ex-girlfriend FKA Twigs suing him for sexual battery, assault, and infliction of emotional distress in December 2020.
"At this point I'm nuclear," he said of that dark time. "Nobody wants to talk to me, including my mother. My manager's not calling. The agent's not calling. I'm not connected to the business anymore.
"I had a gun on the table. I was outta here. I didn't want to be alive anymore when all this happened. Shame like I had never experienced before - the kind of shame that you forget how to breathe. You don't know where to go. You can't go outside and get like a taco. You don't want to go anywhere."
However, Shia noted that he also had "this deep desire to hold on".
The 36-year-old began studying Catholicism in preparation for his portrayal of saint Padre Pio in Abel Ferrara's movie of the same name and even spent time living in a monastery alongside Franciscan Capuchin friars.
His research gave him "hope" that he could get back on the right path and rescue his career.
"I know now that God was using my ego to draw me to Him. Drawing me away from worldly desires," he shared. "It was all happening simultaneously. But there would have been no impetus for me to get in my car, drive up (to the monastery) if I didn't think, 'Oh, I'm gonna save my career.'"
Padre Pio will premiere at the Venice Film Festival, which begins next week.
